British triathlete Fenella Langridge has been battling with an ‘overwhelming’ fear of riding her TT bike in the aftermath of a crash that left her needing hospital treatment in Australia last year.
The 34-year-old admits she felt ‘embarrassed’ after competing at IRONMAN New Zealand earlier this season, having ‘spent hardly any time’ in her aero bars.
Langridge, who was first out of the water in Taupō, finished eighth overall with a time of 9:09:10. Her bike leg, however, was clocked at 5:03:14, compared to the 4:38:01 of winner and compatriot Kat Matthews.
‘Working through some struggles’
After the race, she spoke of needing to ‘work through some struggles’, while last week she finally opened up on the mental scars which have left her needing to seek the support and expertise of a psychologist.
Writing on her Instagram account, Langridge said: “Since my crash in Australia last year, it’s been a much tougher journey than I ever expected. So, in full transparency, I thought I should share.
“Up until last week, I’ve really struggled mentally in a way I hadn’t experienced before. Something as simple as getting into my TT bars became overwhelming, to the point where riding outside felt impossible at times.
“At Ironman New Zealand, I spent hardly any time in my aero bars. Honestly, it was embarrassing, but I just couldn’t do it. No matter how much I tried to push through, my mind wouldn’t let me.
“I just remember seeing athletes ride away, and I couldn’t do anything about it. Something that should be so natural or second nature to an athlete, and especially a professional, felt horrible… I felt like a fraud and a fake. All these emotions were overwhelming and all-encompassing.”
The crash happened in Busselton during a training ride ahead of IRONMAN Western Australia last December, when Langridge explained: “Took a tumble off my bike on Wednesday when my front end suddenly failed, picked up a few bumps and bruises, and ended up needing a whole new front end… but here we are. Grateful, smiling, and ready – so ready – to race and defend my title. ??”
‘Let the good vibes roll’
Sadly, despite posting the third-fastest swim of the day, Langridge recorded a DNF shortly after T1, and it seems that while her physical injuries healed sufficiently in the weeks and months that followed, her mental anxieties persisted.
The crash came just as she was looking to make her return to action after being diagnosed with External Iliac Artery Endofibrosis and needing to undergo surgery.
There is, however, light at the end of the tunnel, and she is feeling confident that the worst of her issues are well and truly behind her.
“I’ve tried everything to work through it,” she added. “Different positions, track sessions, speaking to a psychologist, and while progress has been slow, I’m finally starting to feel like myself. ? ?? Let the good vibes roll.”
