Former triathlon star Braden Currie has broken his leg in a freak accident, which saw him trampled on by a cow that he initially thought was in trouble, only for it to start chasing him across a field when he tried to help it.
The bizarre and extremely painful story was shared on the Kiwi’s Instagram page this week, with the two-time IRONMAN New Zealand winner clearly seeing the funny side of the story by adding an AI-enhanced image of himself being chased by an angry Friesian.
Describing his moment of bovine bother, Currie, who called an end to his 16-year triathlon career at the end of last season, explained how he had, in fact, been extremely lucky to escape with such minor injuries, as the animal later attacked another passer-by with much more serious consequences.
‘She wasn’t a fan of my kindness’
“Well, this weekend was definitely one for the books!” he wrote. “While on a run out on the West Coast, I found a cow who’d gotten stuck upside down – so, being my usual hero self, I helped flip her over. But plot twist – she wasn’t a fan of my kindness!
“Out of nowhere, she got to her feet, turned her head, and at that moment, I saw the intent in her eyes, and I knew she wanted to kill me. I started to run away and dodge her, but I fell over and tried to roll away from her trajectory.”
Lying in the cow’s field and frightened for his life, Currie tried to avoid the oncoming beast by rolling out of the way… but failed.
“She ran over me but only managed to land one hoof square on my calf,” he said. “The other hoof landed between my legs, mm from my manhood. The hoof that landed on me ended up snapping my fibula and bruising my calf.”
‘This time, she went on the rampage’
It was only a few days later that he was informed of just how lucky he had been, as the crazy cow, who clearly loves spending an afternoon lying on her back, caused even more damage to another group of ramblers who tried to help.
“I fared all right in retrospect,” he added. “A few days later, on my way out of the bush, we found out from the farmer that 15 minutes later, another group tried to flip her too.
“This time, she went on a rampage, injuring one of them pretty badly – he had to be airlifted. So, feeling super lucky it wasn’t worse, and I’m just taking it easy, ready for a comeback soon.”
Among the pro athletes to comment on the story was Jelle Geens, who wrote: “Retirement life 😅 luckily not too bad!”, and Hannah Berry, who said: “And they say there are no dangerous animals in NZ 😅 Damn, gutted for you. You’ll be back adventuring soon!”
While the team at Challenge Wanaka suggested he make the most of the incident by adding:
“😮Wishing you a speedy recovery; add ‘survived cow attack’ to the CV. Most athletes taper. You wrestle cattle.”
